I Wrote Some Stuff... I Created Some Stuff

The Clara Cell Review

The Clara Cell Review
Psy570
In the paper The Clara Cell by: A. Winkelmann and T. Noack, I believe the central ethical conflict was how he practiced medicine, which they called "medicine without humanity". Humans have come up with a lot of sayings that describe various things they do such as "the end justifies the means" and " who can put a price on what's for the greater good", but doing things like that such as aiding or reaping the rewards of unjustifiable deaths, as Max Clara did, just to make advances in science is inexcusable even if greater goods came from such experiments and scientific findings. They were all done in vain.

By today's APA code of ethics standards, Max Clara would have been in violation of all 5. He had no morals or responsibility for his actions as they were all for the support of the Nazi regime. He lacked integrity because you cannot possess integrity when you believe and act above the law. Not only was he excepting part of the “more than 4,000 executions in 1943” (725), but “Even 7 years after the Nazi era” (725) he was carefully wording his admission to still accepting cadavers for studies. While some would argue that he had integrity in his work because he continued to do his work for the so-called good of science, but, I believe, he did his work without integrity because with it he would have believed in himself enough to know his work would have stood on better ground and for more had he at least rightfully sought permission to use wrongfully persecuted cadavers. “Integrity is the quality of being honest and having strong moral principles; moral uprightness.” (Wikipedia) Seriously, how do people justify this stuff to themselves? Therefore, he obviously lacked justice as he had a warped sense of justice since the cadavers were of people wrongfully killed for one mans deluded mindset that anyone not Arian must die. Obviously, Max Clara also obliterated the concepts of respect for people’s rights and dignity because he didn't even want to notify the next of kin of what was happening to their loved ones. People were disposable to him; they were nothing more than experimental dummies that he never looked at as humans with souls that bled the same color as he did. He was deluded and narcissistic to but it nicely. Though he may have made advances in science they were made in cold blood and he should never have had the right to have his name associated with anything of note that he found just based on his lack of ethics to how he found it. We should not reap rewards for wrongs. As for ethical standards, well he had absolutely no consent of any form from any of his cadavers while they were living nor from next of kin after they were murdered, period, enough said.

The ethical implications of the Clara cell on contemporary psychology are that you cannot murder people in the name of a regime or science than just act like you're above the law and next to god. Therefore, there are rules, regulations, guidelines, laws, checks and balances, ethical boards and licensing boards, consent forms, sign offs, informational who what when where and whys, paperwork to back up paperwork, morals, and values being taught, support groups and helplines for people who start to have crazy thoughts and so on. The fact that at some point genetics started allowing for lapses in people’s better judgment of right and wrong has lead humanity as a society to have an overabundance of people checking on people so other people don’t get hurt somehow.

Research in society is a hard thing to achieve. People want to be informed but they do not want their privacy to be violated. They want to feel as though they are contributing to the greater good and helping but they want to be in control of everything as if that is something that is tangible to have. It’s become an increasing struggle for researchers to find valid, sound-minded, truthful people to conduct scientific studies on because people need to know everything. Fear of the unknown has become so crippling that scientific advances are hindered legally to keep everyone's rights protected and intact. Psychological professionals just as scientists must make every effort to inform participants of as much as they can and offer ample debriefing of any and all ways after the study is complete so that the participants do not feel hurt, harmed, violated, demoralized, cheated, lied to, not fully informed, disoriented, confused, or any other form of sad or bad. Only glad is accepted nowadays. This not only to the participants themselves but to their families as well.

Works Cited and References:

Winkelmann, A., & Noack, T. (2010, March 11). The Clara Cell: A "Third Reich eponym"? European Respiratory Journal, 36(4), 722-727.
Dusing B. Abschaffung der Todesstrafe in der Bundesrepublik Deutschland. [Abolition of capital punishment in the Federal Republic of Gerrmany.] Dissertation, University of Freiburg/Br., 1952.
Integrity definition. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Integrity

Dual Relationships Vs Multiple Role Relationships in Psychology

Dual Relationships Vs Multiple Role Relationships in Psychology
PSY570

An example of a dual relationship is if a woman, who was a hairdresser, became a client of a therapist, and through the therapy, that fact was divulged. After a while, it was agreed upon that the hairdresser would become the therapists’ hairdresser because she could see so many potentialities with the therapist's hair. It became a mutual verbal, not written, or contractual agreement. This right here is a dual relationship because the therapist/client relationship has now moved into a double role including hairdresser/customer.

The potential issues that could arise are more than a hairstyle is worth. If the hairdresser falls on hard times and wants to barter and trade it leaves a wide-open window for a haircut/styling gone bad and even if the therapist was a paying client it could jade the therapist/client relationship. Even if the hairdresser doesn't fall on hard times but maybe the therapist does and thinks how about a freebie since I know your life story. That’s preying on a person’s kindness who has entrusted you with their precious emotional stability. Exploitation at its finest. However, things could work out wonderfully that each pays their way through the others trade/service and all’s well that goes well, but it’s a slim likelihood in today's fickle society that someone won’t get ticked about something and allow the trickle-down effect to ruin all good things. While the dual relationship should never transpire, if it does, it should be recorded on the therapist’s part and paid full price by both parties on a worked-out/ agreed upon schedule that is never derived from or taken for granted and is contractually signed by both parties. Also, should the therapist/client relationship ever mutually conclude but the hairdresser/customer relationship continues, it should be clearly noted and understood by both parties that while in the hairdressers’ chair therapy doesn't begin?

A good rule of thumb seems to be as Kitchener states in her article titled “Dual Role Relationships: What Makes Them So Problematic?”

Three guidelines are offered to differentiate between relationships that have a high probability of leading to harm and those that do not. First, as the incompatibility of expectations increases between roles, so will the potential for harm. Second, as the obligations associated with different roles diverge, the potential for loss of objectivity and divided loyalties increases. Third, as the power and prestige between the professional’s and consumer’s roles increase, so does the potential for exploitation. Last, it is argued that, as the risks of harm increase, so should the ethical prohibitions about engaging in the relationship.

A multiple role relationships would be if while still counseling the hairdresser the therapist one day meets one of the hairdressers’ colleagues, fellow hairdressers, and strikes up a relationship with that person. Now the hairdressers somehow get into a scuffle and the therapist is in the middle hearing professionally and personally how each hairdresser is a bad person because let’s face it, childish behavior doesn't always come from children. The APA would say these relationships should never have commenced let alone escalated, let alone anything because the therapist should know better. Now not only are the hairdressers in bad emotional stances they are putting added strain on the therapist trying to smooth it out so that hairdresser one doesn't Sinead O'Connor the therapists’ hair because of a poor word choice combination that triggers a bad reaction while the therapist is sitting in the hairdresser’s chair for her monthly trim. Because the therapist feels she owes it to hairdresser one to not abandon her on any level yet it's splitting her loyalties. Common sense would say this is just bad all the way around and no matter how it's handled the poop is knee-deep and everyone is getting hurt. However, in the article “Dual Relationships Not Always Bad”, "Not all multiple relationships are created equal. There are different types of multiple relationships." (Zur, 2007)

A social multiple relationship is one in which a therapist and client are also friends, acquaintances, or have some other type of social relations within their community.
A professional multiple relationship is where a psychotherapist/counselor and client, are also professional colleagues in colleges or training institutions, presenters in professional conferences, co-authors of a book, or other situations that create professional multiple relationships.
Institutional multiple relationships take place in the military, prisons, some police departments, and mental hospitals where multiple relationships are an inherent part of the institutional settings.
Forensic multiple relationships involve clinicians who serve as treating therapists, evaluators, and witnesses in trials or hearings.
Supervisory relationships inherently involve multiple relationships and multiple loyalties. A supervisor has a professional relationship and duty to the supervisee and to the client, as well as to the profession.
A sexual multiple relationship is where a therapist and client are also involved in a sexual relationship.
Sexual multiple relationships with current clients are always unethical. A business multiple relationship is generally ill-advised. These are relationships, in which a therapist and client are business partners or have an employer-employee relationship.

His bullet points are very interesting as almost all avenues I’ve looked through pedal push the many reasons why it is bad but Zur does make strong points about how much multiple role relationships exist in small towns and how it is inevitable or in forensics or prisons. Which the APA does list that if multiple roles do become present that: "Multiple relationships can be ethical or unethical, legal or illegal, and can be avoidable, unavoidable, or mandated. They can also be planned and anticipated or unexpected. Then they can be concurrent or sequential and can also vary with different levels of involvement, from low/minimal to intense." In its fifth and final paragraph, Standard 3.05 recognizes that psychologists are sometimes required to serve in more than one role in judicial or administrative proceedings, and so cannot always avoid or fully resolve a potentially harmful multiple relationship. When a psychologist encounters such a situation, the Ethics Code focuses the psychologist on informing those affected about the change in expectations. The reasoning behind the code's language is that if a psychologist must take on a potentially harmful multiple roles, the best way to help protect those affected is to inform them of the change in circumstances.

A comparison can be made that in each instance the therapist, the knowing individual, should politely refrain from any role relationship with any clients that adds to the therapist/client relationship. It’s not that simple always but whenever possible a therapist should make every effort to keep it that simple. Beyond that comparison, the dual relationship has a better potential for panning out with minimal detrimental effect if done with complete open communication. The more people involved the harder it is to keep the lines of communication open with everyone involved.

Works Cited and References:

Kitchener, K. S. (1988, December). Dual Role Relationships: What Makes Them So Problematic? Journal of Counseling & Development, 67(4), 217-221. Retrieved November 6, 2016.
Zur, O. (2012, January 11). Multiple Relationships Not Always Bad. Retrieved November 6, 2016, from http://nationalpsychologist.com/2012/01/multiple-relationships-not-always-bad/101587.html
Behnke, S., Dr. (2004, January). Multiple relationships and APA's new Ethics Code: Values and applications. Retrieved November 6, 2016, from http://www.apa.org/monitor/jan04/ethics.aspx Vol. 35 No. 1 Pg. 66

Is Anger Better to Hold In or Let It Out?

Is Anger Better to Hold In or Let It Out?

For years, I have always heard from various people that holding in one’s anger is bad and that I should let it out, but I have always been skeptical about such a claim, even though I do indeed express my frustration and anger about many things. It seems that in doing so I have never seemed to get over what has made me angry, only gotten angrier about it. Either expressing it has led to more fighting or other people fueling my aggravated fire. So, I am looking to research: Whether holding in anger is good or letting out the anger is better?

Per the American Psychological Association: “One out of five Americans has an anger management problem.” “Anger is an emotional state that varies in intensity from mild irritation to intense fury and rage. Like other emotions, it is accompanied by physiological and biological changes; when you get angry, your heart and blood pressure go up, as do the levels of your energy hormones adrenaline and noradrenaline.”

"Most normal people experience anger a few times a week, says Kassinove. According to a 1997 study by him and his colleagues, 58% of anger episodes include yelling or screaming. And less than 10% involve physical aggression." Which he then goes on to say that "A lot of ways in which we think when we're angry to make situations worse." This is why he uses a "cognitive-relaxation intervention" that statistically lowered anger in the college students he studies significantly.

If different forms of anger from different anger forming situations were observed from a randomized set of people, they could be watched to separate ones who held in their anger from those who did not. Upon separating those people into two groups another set of tests could be conducted to figure out who is more mentally and physically affected by the anger, those holding it in, or those expressing it. Tests such as blood pressure and heart monitoring, stress tests, and mental evaluations could all be performed to answer who was being more affected. A set of physical and mental tests prior to the anger invoking instances would have to also be performed to establish a base for each individual participant to gauge their anger. A measure of their resting state to compare to their angered state. Once each set of data was collected an interpretation of it could determine who was in better mental and physical condition, therefore answering the question of whether it’s better to hold in one’s anger or let it out.

Using the scientific method to test random and large groups of people to figure out whether it is better to express anger or not is a much better way to answer this question as opposed to the method of tenacity of believing the long-running myth that it’s better to let the anger out. Psychologist Brad Bushman believes that it is a perpetuation by the media that keep that myth alive and kicking, that for the purpose of always having a story they want people to believe that it’s better to express anger. He states: “One likely reason for the continued widespread belief in catharsis is that the mass media continue to endorse the view that expressing anger or aggressive feelings is healthy, constructive, and relaxing, whereas restraining oneself creates tension that is unhealthy and bound to lead to an eventual blowup.”

Further stating that: “The belief that observing violence (or ‘ventilating it’) gets rid of hostilities has virtually never been supported by research” (pg. 194) “Because activities that are cathartic also are aggressive, they could lead to the activation of other aggressive thoughts, emotions, and behavioral tendencies, which in turn could lead to greater anger and aggression.” (pg. 368) (Berkowitz, 1984; Tice & Baumeister, 1993) “People expect that performing cathartic activities will reduce their anger and aggression, when cathartic activities are actually more likely to have the opposite effect” (Geen & Quanty, 1977; Warren & Kurlychek, 1981).

Which would clarify why I cannot seem to get over anything or let anything go. The more I get angry and “ventilate it” the angrier I get and the longer it continues to stay with me. The longer the anger stays with me the more likely I am to get angrier over other small stuff, as much as the big stuff, quicker and therefore keeping the anger with me and allowing to it grow exponentially over time. All of which are unhealthy factors for our minds and bodies. In conclusion, it is not better to express it constantly. It is better to learn to control one’s anger and learn other ways to think when anger starts to creep into one’s emotional discourse. The scientific method was used in a study done in 1997 by Brad Bushman and his colleagues that proved just that, beating out the method of tenacity.

Works Cited and References:

Bushman, B. J., Baumeister, R. F., & Stack, A. D. (1999). Catharsis, Aggression, and Persuasive Influence: Self-fulfilling or Self-Defeating Prophecies? [Abstract]. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 76(3), 367-368.
Holloway, J. D. (2003, March). Advances in Anger Management. Monitor Staff, 34(3). Retrieved from http://www.apa.org/monitor/mar03/advances.aspx
Controlling Anger Before it Controls You. (2008). Retrieved October 28, 2016, from http://stepupprogram.org/docs/handouts/STEPUP_Controlling_Anger_Before_It_Controls_You.pdf

School Counselor Job Burnout

Assignment Discussion
Ethical Psychology 570

School Counselor Burnout

One area that could be identified as a common reason for unethical decision making in school counseling is burnout.

"School counselors like all mental health professionals are at high risk for burnout. High caseloads, job role ambiguity, and lack of supervision increase their propensity for burnout. Three areas were selected for study in this article due to their potential impact on burnout: Supervision, student-to-counselor-ratios, and non-guidance related duties. Hierarchical multiple regression analyses were conducted and findings indicate non-guidance related duties and supervision are the best predictors of burnout."

Based on the information stated here by Michael Moyer in his Journal of School Counseling article it seems clear that unethical decision making could occur on the part of a guidance counselor due to burnout that stems from incompetence to be able to do their job proficiently because they are forced to guide others without adequate sources of guidance themselves, plus added caseload work unrelated to their core duties.

"Given their many responsibilities, the various roles that school counselors inhabit, the importance of the work they do with students, and the complicated nature of the U.S. educational system, it is clear that school counselors are vulnerable to harmful levels of stress (Bryant & Constantine, 2006, Culbreth, Scarborough, Banks & Johnson & Soloman, 2005)."

When harmful levels of stress start to take a toll on a person's emotional and physical well-being the ability to filter what they say and do becomes harder and harder and it continually widens the door for unethical mishaps to creep in.

"The Maslach Burnout Inventor -Educators Survey (MBI-ES; C. Maslach, S.E. Jackson, & M.P. Leitee, 1996) was used to examine burnout among professional school counselors (N=198). Guided by stress-strain-coping theory, final hierarchical regression models accounted for 49% of the variation in the emotional exhaustion scale, 27% on the depersonalization scale, and 36% on the personal accomplishment scale. Numerous individual stress & coping variables significantly predicted burnout among school counselors in the multivariate context."

Emotional exhaustion is a depletion of one’s own energy to do any job let alone do it competently. Depersonalization is the ability to care about each student fairly without bias or prejudice no matter what the problem is and help them with respect to their individual needs always at the forefront of the counselors’ mind. Personal accomplishment being the ability to look at one’s self in the mirror and feel good about the things they have accomplished and what they plan to continue to accomplish as a counselor and person. These are extremely important to be able to be the best counselor a child needs and that you can be proud to be. Without the proper guidance about the job you’re going to undertake as to what the expectations are and the training to avoid burnout then incompetence to perform a quality job and ethical mistakes are bound to occur.

If schools would simply ease the workload on school counselors with proper training and explanations of what their primary goals and focuses should be and divide the caseload amongst more than one counselor, then many of these issues would be avoided. Which, would free up mind space to keep filters intact which helps counselors and anyone from making bad decisions that considerable amounts of stress can lead people to make poor judgments and careless costly mistakes.

Works Cited and References:

Moyer, M. (2011). Effects of Non-Guidance Activities, Supervision, and Student-to-Counselor Ratios on School Counselor Burnout [Abstract]. 9(5), 31. Retrieved October 28, 2016.
Wilkerson, K. (2009). An Examination of Burnout Among School Counselors Guided by Stress-Strain-Coping Theory [Abstract]. Journal of Counseling and Development, 87, 428.
McCarthy, C., Von Horn Kerne, V., Calfa, N. A., Lambert, R. G., & Guzman, M. (2010, February). An Exploration of School Counselors' Demands and Resources: Relationship to Stress, Biographic, and Caseload Characteristics [Abstract]. Professional School Counseling, 13(3), 146.

Scientific Research Discussion Notes

Assignment Discussion
October 24th 2016
Research and Analysis 500

According to the four steps of the scientific method

1) Observation and Description

2) Hypothesis Formulation

3) Use of the Hypothesis

4) Testing

Freud's theories were in part in accordance with these methodical steps. (In my opinion of course.)

While a large part of his work was done without regard for testing the masses like we do today with our many advances and advantages to our scientific communities, that doesn't mean that the man didn't test any subjects at all in terms of his many observations, a multitude of theories, hysteria hypothesis and continual use of his own scientific method in his head testing in detail the patients he had.

According to S.A. McLeod, "Science uses an empirical approach" which is an approach where you "gain knowledge through experience" which is what we consider as our scientific method now. By this standard, I believe that Freud did just that. He only had a small testing bank of people. While Freud is not the father of experimental psychology, he is widely considered the father of psychology which came first. So by today's standards, I would be inclined, as most will, to say that Freud's theories are not scientific. However, by the standards that were in place at the time in which he was in practice and where he was located with his availability for resources, I believe he was at that time.

According to the paper Psychoanalysis: Freud's Revolutionary Approach by Kristen M. Beystehner there is a debate over Freud's data. Further proving that he was adhering to a scientific method, despite its early development and his limited number of participants. Ms. Beystehner sites Grunbaum (author of "Precis of the Foundations of Psychoanalysis: A Philosophical Critique") and other critics as contending "that Freud's theory is lacking in empirical evidence and relies too heavily on therapeutic achievements, whereas others assert that even Freud's clinical data are flawed, inaccurate, and selective at best." Then siting the counter by Edelson and Shevrin that "Freud's admirable heuristic hypothesis did not come out of the thin air or simply out of his imagination.. extra clinical methods must be drawn upon in addition to the clinical method because the clinical method is the only way we can be in touch with certain phenomena". Ms. Beystehner further elaborated "Only with quantification, many critics assert, can supposedly scientific theories even begin to be evaluated based on their empirical merits." That, in my opinion, is proved when she went on to report that Freud "fully presented only twelve cases, but he had mentioned over one hundred minor cases."

Whether they were accepted or not for the purpose of the question asked again, yes, I believe they were scientific theories because he followed the scientific method at the time he was practicing psychology as he saw fit to the best of his ability.

In terms of pseudoscience what makes a psychological theory scientific is being able to prove it with the scientific method of empirical evidence. According to the article, "What is Pseudoscience? Distinguishing Between Science and Pseudoscience is Problematic" by Michael Shermer, Freud was pseudoscience because his theories "could never be disproved because there was no testable hypothesis open to refutability." I disagree as I believe Freud had many hypotheses for things that have been proven throughout the test of time. Things such as aliens, horoscopes, and mediums are all subjects of a pseudoscience because while they have all stood the test of time they have never been confirmed in a laboratory setting with controlled variables or confirmed by our government yet as real.

Works Cited and References:

McLeod, S.A. (2008). Psychology As A Science. Retrieved From: www.simplypsychology.org/science-pschology.html
Beystehner, Kristen M. (1998). Psychoanalysis: Freud's Revolutionary Approach to Human Personality. Retrieved From: www.personalityresearch.org/papers/beystehner.html
Shermer, Michael (2011). What is Pseudoscience? Distinguishing Between Science and Pseudoscience is Problematic. Retrieved From: www.scienticamerican.com/article/what-is-pseudoscience/

Falling Snow (In here just cause it's neat)

Behavioral Change Project

Temper

I let my temper get the best of me in particular situations.
Currently, I am working on controlling my temper through deep breathing and making more time for myself.
My desire to give in to what other people want, which is a woman who will never say anything about how hard it is to be the head of the household in all aspects, the go-to-girl, and the listener; so basically my stubbornness.
It probably started subconsciously in my 2’s.
Relaxed and calm

Right now I am not as bad as I have been. I am starting to calm down with regard to being so pissed off all the time at home. Dale is trying very hard to keep his own temper in check too, because through our many various fights I have pointed out on several occasions that most of what we're going through is a by-product of the irresponsible choices he has made over his life and more so in the last 3 years that we have been together (in the context of our relationship alone).

My Data:

Week 1 of flying off my grid

Antecedent: Dale made the comment that I am not nice to him.

Behavior: I told him that I’m sorry that it is hard to be nice to him when his only thing is to pay the house bills and pay them on time but he waits until the last minute, sometimes beyond, and willingly puts my name and credit at risk.

Thoughts: This all while texting/screaming on the phone while I’m at my job on the work floor or held up in the bathroom because he decides to start this when I’m on my half-hour lunch break.

Consequence: A Fight

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Antecedent: Dale makes the comment that I do not do anything for him.

Behavior: Listing all the things I have done for him in the over 3 years we’ve been together, then telling him I don’t think he’s a man, listing why I don’t think he is one, listing what a real one is and telling him that I know this because I have had to become one since our son has been born.

Thoughts: This again all starts on my lunch break and continues while I’m on the work floor until he goes to bed. Only this time when I went to sleep when I got home I slept on my keys so that he couldn’t take my car the next day, because we only have one car since they took his away for too many points on his vehicle's plate and his 3 pending DUI’s. He flipped and I said, “I thought I didn’t do anything for you.”

Consequence: A Fight

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Antecedent: My dog pisses on my carpet and he is 13 years old and no it is not because he is too old, it is because he is a pain in my ass. He is a well taken care of a dog who goes out all day long and who gets fed plenty but when he isn’t getting the attention he feels he deserves, because I have a kid now, he acts out.

Behavior: Screaming at him that he is an asshole and why does he have to keep doing this.

Thoughts: I don’t want to get mad but am I supposed to just let him continue to piss on my house because he wants to be a brat. This is the definition of irony, pissing on what I have worked so hard to achieve because it’s all just what, material things right? Money means nothing; it too can just be pissed away.

Consequence: Screaming at the dog and cleaning up his mess.

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Antecedent: Guy I work with confides in me that he was having an affair with his wife for the past 5 months with a girl he really fell for since his wife refuses to do her wifely duties anymore and is only a mom. To which I listen for like the first few days to all the negative women bashing and life bashing he does because his wife found out when he was at a party with the other woman so he left the party and later found out so did the other woman only with another man.

Behavior: After listening to that much bitching and whining I said, “Seriously, you got what you deserved. If you can’t stand the heat don’t go into the f**king kitchen. All women are not whores, but you’re certainly not a man! You didn’t have to cheat, but you did, so suck it up and grow up.”

Thoughts: Why me?

Consequence: Me blowing up.

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Antecedent: My friend Michelle, who has a failed marriage as well, is in love with another married man, who takes advantage of her feelings for him but has made it clear he isn’t going to leave his wife and kids for her, keeps floundering back and forth on whether she should stop talking to him or not. Months of listening to this, because she is my son’s godmother, I get snippy and frank with her too.

Behavior: “As long as you give him the time of day you’re telling him that your still there whenever he wants or needs you despite how much you cry. Knock it off and quit or shut your damn mouth and stop blubbering about it.”

Thoughts: Why me?

Consequence: Me blowing up

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Antecedent: My pap claims I have no respect for my mother at Thanksgiving and that he would be surprised if I ever gave her any.

Behavior: “Seriously!?! I do and who do you think you are?” Then he came back with “What I’m not supposed to say what I think.” “Apparently I’m not,” I said in retort. To which he came back with “No, 'cause you’re a kid.”

Thoughts: This cant be my family, nor my life.

Consequence: With that, I left my uncle's place and did not spend Thanksgiving with my mom because that was uncalled for. Then a few days later I talk to my mom and she says how my pap is mad at me and I say “I don’t care” and she tells me to consider myself not having a grandfather anymore then I said, “whatever he hasn’t been around and still isn’t so that’s not that hard to do”. To which she goes back and forth with me and eventually concludes by saying “is this the way you’re going to raise my grandson”. I said, “yes, I will make sure he is never bullied in his life like I have been in mine and that he speaks his mind”. So she said that we should just go about my life without her in it too. (Later that same day we didn’t say we were sorry cause we each are not sorry at all but I told her she had mail at my house (her legal residence, yes is my house), and she said love you and I said yeah, love you too).

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Antecedent: I walk into a house full of smoke when I get home from work

Behavior: After turning off and unplugging the toaster oven, where the smoke was billowing from, I go into the living room and yell “Really!?! You’re aiming to burn the house down now?”

Thoughts: Why me!?!

Consequence: Dale gets up with an “Oh Shit”, smokes a cigarette, tries to tell me that I’m not perfect too, then goes back to sleep while I clean up the smoke-filled house and then stare at the ceiling deep breathing like a nut cause I can't fall asleep.

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My data:

Week 2 trying to

Antecedent: Michelle goes out drinking on her lunch with a co-worker and the co-worker drinks way too much and holds herself up in the bathroom cause Michelle to not get back to work. It becomes a big huge incident and she tells me about it and says not to say anything. However I was mad about the incident because it put Michelle in a shitty situation, so I made a bad judgment call and said something to one person and it got back to Michelle that I did and she got pissed at me.

Behavior: I calmly said I was sincerely sorry and I couldn’t say anything else except that and I hope she could forgive me. (Instead of instinctually yelling at her about the fact that she should have never went, to begin with.)

Thoughts: Why do I choose friends that don’t use their common sense? She let a wasted co-worker jeopardize her job and for what, nothing, because this co-worker wasn’t even a good friend to her.

Consequence: We hugged and made up.

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Antecedent: I ask my mother to come over and watch her grandson while I finish this school work

Behavior: I call her and ask her if she’s free and she does her usual “I don’t know, I’ll have to see how things go and how I feel, I’ll pencil you in.” then we say our pleasantries and hang up.

Thoughts: I can’t win!

Consequence: A depressed/disappointed feeling as opposed to an enraged feeling.

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Antecedent: My boss improperly excesses me and my fellow co-workers to another operation while there are still clerk employees on my machine doing my mail handler job. All while his boss, who told him to do the excessing, was handling the mail himself.

Behavior: So I stopped working and stood there watching them. When I was asked what I was doing, I said, “watching you guys so I know what times to report on my grievance”.

Thoughts: If postal management would simply comply with rules and not be idiotic then I wouldn’t want to go postal.

Consequence: I was taken in the office where I properly vented and was granted union time to write up my grievance.

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11-14 and so on..

Antecedent: any other incident that may have occurred

Behavior: I quit! Instead of listening or reacting or caring, I honestly said “screw it!” to myself and put my headphones on at work and just buried my head in my pillow at home.

Thoughts: While I know it isn’t the most responsible or mature thing to do, avoidance, I decided for my own health it was best.

Consequence: I felt depressed and disappointed instead of enraged.

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Analysis of My Data:

Each of these incidents are examples of times when I have lost my temper with people who are involved in my life on a regular basis and who shower the world with negative energy to the point that after a while of listening to it I snap. My friend Ed, who is no better than the ones listed above in the negative energy area, joked with me that since I have been in my relationship with Dale my tolerance for assholes has completely ceased. He said that before I used to just let stuff roll off me and not pay it much mind but now I just rip people a new one because I can’t stand all the bitching and crying and complaining. All of the negative energy has turned me into one of them because I consciously hear myself doing the same thing and so after discussing it at length with my therapist my avenues of change are too deep breath as much as I can even if I feel ridiculous and to take time out of my day to enjoy something, like my Starbucks.

My data definitely does show that I have a temper issue. Although it also shows that I have a less than desirable support system, which makes me want to cry, but I don’t, I exhale and move on. It also shows that I can get results from just breathing instead of blowing up, of course, I knew that already, I just blew up the case a person can only listen to so much crap before “going postal” occurs. It’s a good thing I can joke about all this in my retellings to people, at least then I can make people laugh with the series of unfortunate events that are my life.

What is Causing My Behavior: In Short Form...

When I was 7 my gram died and my mother watched her mother/best friend die before her eyes over a long battle with cancer and I watched my mother die inside. All the while my father started drinking heavily and beating on my mom and so we left only for my mom to get hooked up with another guy real quick cause my mom can’t be alone. We moved to a new school district, my dad was a drunken alcoholic drug addict and I had to go with it all. I got mixed up with the wrong kids who turned into my bullies, then my mom got onto the internet and met different guys and everyone was cheating on everyone and I was still going to school. The story continues but it’s a moot point, the idea has been established.

I haven’t had a support system, I don’t know what one is like, and due to my stubborn independent nature from taking care of myself for so long, I probably would run away from support if it was offered because again I wouldn’t know how to react. I at least know all of this through extensive self-reflection and analysis. (Which is more than I can say for most people.) I accept who I am and that because I have been running down the Rd. less traveled for most of my life I accept that the choices I make are no one's fault but my own now because along the way I could have done something different but I didn’t.

So what causes me to have a bad temper is my inability to deal with everyone else’s crap anymore because that is all I deal with and it is so exhausting, because it is all negative crap instead of happy crap. Who has happy crap anymore? My life is a sitcom that hasn’t been produced yet and that is why I act the way I do.

A healthy dose of blunt with an animated sarcastic punch is what I am now.

My behavioral implemented change is immersing myself in my sons love, try really hard to deep breath as much as possible, tune out what I can by walking away, reading when I get a split second, going to therapy every Monday, keeping my bucket list in front of me, dancing to my iPod if I can, and drinking my chai tea when I can afford it. While I know it is ultimately up to me to do what I need to in my life to make it all that it can be, I honestly can only do so much, and I do really think that I am. However, the other people in my life are not all people I can just throw out and ignore (no matter who much my mother's side of the family has perfected that technique and/or spread out throughout the country like my father's side has done in hopes that a yearly reunion will cover the “there for you” aspect) they are people that are vital parts of my life because I just can't pursue alone right now. (I’m strong but not that strong and I’m simply not ready for alone yet.) So it is my choice to keep them a vital part.

(I know this is long, but I am a wordy person. I’m sorry. Also, I know this is not in the format of the example you posted, but this is how I keep a diary. Temper is the only thing I can think that I want to change and am currently working on, and to me, it doesn’t fit into a grid format or with charts. So at the risk of a docked grade, I see no data that I could chart for you. I’m honest and I try and that’s all I can do right now, and I am ok with that.)

The Whole "Unlimited Power" Book Personal Question Analysis

Chapter 4: The Birth of Excellence: Belief
Assignment: Go through each of the five origins of beliefs. Give an example of where each of these origins has let to a personal belief.

1. Environment- I am a product of a middle-class upbringing and that has shaped me into being a middle-class adult. I was raised with a sense of pride in myself and the work that I do no matter what it is. I was raised to believe that hard work pays off. I was raised to believe that you can in fact run away from your problems but if you should return they will be waiting for you. Also that no matter where you go if you don’t have a good sense of self you’ll create the same problems wherever you are. I am not racist, I believe in equality, so if I don’t like someone it’s based on their personality. I was raised to know that money is the root of all evil and that it is the structure on which our society is based so I could decide what that meant for me. I was raised, independent. I was raised around fighting, so I am a fighter to the bitter end.

2. Events- My Grams death has instilled/imprinted on my every fiber of being that one person has the ability to impact a whole ocean of people. Since I was 7 years old I have watched the slow and painful destruction of an entire family as if the glue that bonded it evaporated and disappeared. So it is absolutely true that one person does make a difference and one person can change anything and everything.

3. Knowledge- I was raised on sitcoms, the school mandated reading, and a vast diversity of music. These have instilled in me a wide range of perspectives for the world around me and have helped me gain a powerful ability to cope through sarcastic witticisms and humor, for it is better to laugh than to drown in hopelessness. These have taught me about the diversity in the world around me so that I do not walk blindly through my life but knowing that all people are equal yet we are all uniquely different in thought and soul. These have given me insight into the power of the well thought out plan, the power of organization, power of timing, and the power of the spoken word even though much can be conveyed without saying or doing anything at all.

4. Past Results- I have made numerous amounts of mistakes in my life and I have learned to reflect, but try not to dwell, in an effort to never repeat the same mistake twice. Despite the fact that I keep making school of hard knocks choices instead of switching up my style of mistakes.

5. Creating in your mind the experience you desire in the future as if it were now by creating the world you want and stepping into it- I have dreams and visions all the time and some make huge imprints on my self. Those ones that do are essentially my desires and they do come to fruition. Such as when I bought my house, had my son, and re-enrolled back in school (again).

Chapter 5: The Seven Lies of Success
Assignment: Go through the seven "lies" and give examples of how you use them in your life.

1. Everything Happens for a Reason- On a very short-sighted materialistic level, when I am shopping and I see something that I like I buy it (that is, if I can afford to). I do not think whether I can use it right now or not I just buy it because I know that at some point I will find a use for it or a place for it. Days, weeks, months, even years later a situation may arise and I will remember oh yeah, I don’t need to buy anything for this purpose I already have it. Why, because everything happens for a reason in its own good time. In life, I have been able to transfer that simple piece of knowledge to comfort me in knowing that when I meet someone and I get a good feeling about them I may not have a clue why they are supposed to be in my life but at some point, they will be essential to my life. (Those who I do not get a good feeling about I avoid like a plague and again for what I eventually find out, 99% of the time, was for good reason.) Other examples would be that when I buy a car, I have found out, it's so my dad can have a car to drive later on down the road when I upgrade and when I bought my house, it was so that when my mom and stepdad split she had a residence and so my ex had a safe place to recover after he got out of rehab, and currently a safe/stable home for my current boyfriend and my son to call home. What I do is for a reason that will always come to light.

2. There is No Such Thing as Failure- To fail is to not get up in the morning. I get up every morning, therefore I do not fail.

3. Whatever Happens, Take Responsibility- I choose to be friends with and date the underdog, therefore my life has been a struggle of catastrophe to triumph. I didn’t feel challenged enough at school, and let bullies push me around so I hid in the corner behind my 6 ft tall boyfriend at the time till school was over and therefore graduated with a 2.3 GPA. I let people chime in my ear about what I should do with my life therefore I changed my major twice and I work for the United States Post Office. I let my boyfriends tell me when I should start my family life so instead of starting it when I wanted, I started it when I got fed up. All of these are NO ONE's FAULT BUT MY OWN for allowing other people to direct me, while I sat around lazy complaining and bitching about how much I don’t like my life. Now I get fed up and jump without regard to whether there is a net under me because I’m tired of doing what other people want me to do. This I take responsibility for to, I take responsibility for waking up just like it would be my fault if I choose not to.

4. It’s Not Necessary to Understand Everything to be Able to Use Everything- I know a little of everything so that I can sound like I know a lot. I watched the movie Born Yesterday with Melanie Griffith, a great movie, explains this point perfectly.

5. People are the Greatest Resource- Everyone has a specialty, a knack for something, a refined skill, and it is important to utilize people for what they are good at. When I need something done, even on a simple day to day scale, I ask who I know will tell me how I can get the job done right. If I need help about my plants I call my dad, if I need something cooked I call my boyfriend, if I need to know something about baking I call my mom, if I need to know about my car I call my friend Ed, if I need medical advice I call my friend Michelle, and so on...

6. Work is Play- I don’t know this one all that well except to say that anything I have ever done artistically, academically or helpfully (helping a friend through a hard time) were things I did because I loved doing them and time didn’t exist when I did them and it was great.

7. There is No Abiding Success Without Commitment- I will never get to where I want to be unless I am committed to getting there!

Chapter 6 & 7: Mastering Your Mind: How to Run Your Brain & The Syntax of Success
Assignment: What is your primary modality when you are happy? What is your primary modality when you are stressed?

This is not an attempt to dodge the question or be over/mello dramatic it’s the honest to god truth, I am not sure I have really ever been happy to where I could give a primary modality. I can say that my son makes me happy and I have smiled and laughed many times in my life but smiling and laughing aren’t the absolute definition of happiness. When it comes to my son there isn’t one specific visual/auditory/kinesthetic thing that flips that happy switch on for me because no matter what he does, even when he’s bad, I’m happy inside and out that I have this wonderful little man in my life. Everything else is just superficial.

In terms of stress, I suffer from anxiety/tension disorder that essentially keeps me on edge all the time. I am always stressed and even when I’m deep breathing my muscles are tense and I’m waiting for the “knife to go thru my back”. While I understand that Mr. Robbins believes this is all in my head and to a large extent I agree, I’m not sure how to turn it off and I have tried just telling myself and it doesn’t work that way. (P.s. Of all the chapters in this book chap 7 didn’t make much sense to me, so hopefully I at least partially answered this question.)

Assignment: Try the Swish technique. Report on the effect of it on you.

This is a simple mind switching technique and while I grasp the concept, to me this is ridiculous. It is absolutely silly to me that there are people out there (and I know there are) that need this and it works for them.

I simply tell myself to do whatever needs to be done and I can do it. I don’t need to re-represent something in an effort to reprogram my thinking, I just need to tell myself it needs to be done and while it may take a minute to get done cause I get sidetracked and distracted, whatever it is eventually gets done whether I like doing it or not.

Chapter 8: How to Elicit Someone's Strategy

Assignment: Determine the primary modality of a person you know. Justify your belief.

For convenience, I choose to figure out my boyfriend’s primary modality and it’s kinesthetic.

I can make my points and stress my thoughts to him best through him feeling what I mean. Plain words or visual stimuli do not click with him, he has to feel what I am feeling in order to understand it. Also when he is displaying what he thinks, he chooses to display it through his feelings, he gets very emotional and he is very hands-on with everything he can be.

Chapter 11: Limitation Disengage: What Do You Want?

Assignment: Pick a goal you have and state it in terms of the five principles of goal setting.

Goal: To eventually be an artist/art therapist living very close to a beach.

1. My outcome will be to be walking on the beach with my kids and my husband while we walk our family dog, all happy to be together. All of this following a day full of artistic ventures and school-related activities and helpful endeavors for our community, like helping at the local library or counseling parents and children to communicate better with each other. This will be accompanied by a feeling of financial stability and security that the people I have in my life are there and not running away.

2. This outcome looks like something out of a movie with sand between our toes and warm salty ocean air blowing through our hair. With clothes on that came from old navy and are clothes that we wear not cherish or iron. It is the picture of my kids running along with the dog throwing Frisbees and balls and the dog chasing them and bringing them back and maybe a random beach find. It is a picture of my husband and me walking arm in arm reveling in the moment that is then and the happiness that we are the proud parents and best friends to our kids. The sky is painted with an array of colors and the clouds are puffy and white. The air tastes like salt mixed with cold cut sandwich meats and cheeses from dinner on the deck. It sounds like a choir of seagulls going crazy for food and children screaming with happiness at how much fun they’re having and tiny whispers of love and talk of what life has brought and will bring.

3. I will look like an aged woman but with smile lines instead of wrinkles and I will look like a woman who is a mom and not teenager or twenty-some kid chasing down the dawn. I will look like a happy woman who is in love with her life, her job, her family, and who has told those who don’t matter to go away and cherished those who are important. I will look like a woman who makes time to do yoga, the charter school my kids, work from home and a community office, cook dinner, walk on the beach, watch a sitcom or 2, and read before falling asleep in a bed that’s warm.

4. I need to start taking care of my body better before I can start making great strives and headway on my goals. Currently, I suffer from too little of the right sleep and too little of the right food and too little of the right kind of time needed to attain anything. Once I can figure out a good schedule I’ll be on my way, currently, I’m still in the trial and error phase of it.

5. While I am aware that anything and everything can always go wrong, as long as I stay focused that the beach will be a great place for me and my family, eventually we will get there. I just need to not project so much, know my goal, and take each day a day at a time. It’s pointless to live in the future not here yet and miss the present that is right here now and therefore miss the goal I want so bad because I didn’t really see it when it came.

Chapter 12: The Power of Precision
Assignment: With the goal that you set up in the last chapter, think of asking a specific person to help you. Go through the five principles of asking with that person in mind and write what you discovered.

While I understand what this chapter is saying, I do not believe that I can really ask anyone specifically to “get me to the beach”. Not in an effort to dodge the question but I do not have a very great support system in my life at all. They love me and they go along with what I want but mostly because they have no means to stop me and they need to reap whatever I may sow as opposed to support me. Meaning I cannot just ask my family or friends for a loan or to watch my son while I go chase my dreams or even babysit while I go do what I need to do without hops and flames of irritating proportions first. That gets old. So I do not ask for anything ever unless I absolutely need it and I always brace myself that I will get a resounding “sorry, but I can’t help”. So I do what I need to and can when I can and how I can.

However, in relation to this chapter, I did ask someone to help pay for the rest of my tuition for my bachelor's degree. I asked my stepfather, who is the only person that I know that loves me and could afford to long term loan me the money to finish and he already knew how important school has been to me and my struggles with it so I did ask specifically, and I did ask the only person who was in any position to even maybe help me. I didn’t need to create value to it or be focused beyond just asking “would you be so kind as to pay for the rest of my tuition since I have run out of aid”, and I didn’t need to continue to ask he gave me an answer right then. He said yes because he knew how much getting a degree meant to me, how much I have gone through so far in relation to school, that my parents weren’t willing to help, and he was my only option. He does believe in me, and he loves me like I was his own daughter now and he wants to see me accomplish this and be done with it (and personally I think he does feel a little guilty that he didn’t help me 13 years ago). Grad school is on me to figure out.

Chapter 13: The Magic of Rapport
Assignment: Observe two people interacting for a couple of minutes. How did they match and mirror each other? Do you think they felt close or distant?

Dale and I mirror each other in our attitudes and demeanor so much it’s unnerving. As we do not bring out the best in each other and we consequently become distant from each other frequently in the heat of the moment and then close as we each reflect on the fact that we would have each reacted in the exact same way had we been in each other's shoes.

Frequently I have stood looking at him and I and I know what I’m seeing and it’s surreal.

As for watching, say, other people, I work with, I haven’t really noticed a lot of matching or mirroring on an individual level only on a group level of when one person gets pissed at a managers decision others will follow suit and work slower or get irritated but where I work isn’t a lot of individual interactions its warehouse of mass mail moving groups trying to get through a lot of mail in a continual 24 hr clock of 8-12 hr shifts.

Otherwise, I don’t go out much, like to people watch at the mall. I go to work and come home. I’m in a one-car family and I work nights and he works days.

Chapter 14: Distinctions of Excellence: Metaprograms
Assignment: For each of the metaprograms, choose which one you are and explain why you chose that one. Toward vs. Away, External vs. Internal, Sorting by Self vs. Sorting by Others, Matcher vs. Mismatcher, Possibility vs. Necessity, Independent vs. Proximity vs. Cooperative working style.

1. Toward vs. Away- It depends upon the situation. It doesn’t seem fair to just classify myself as one or the other all the time. While it doesn’t always appear that I am moving toward anything because of my stellar ability to procrastinate like a champ, I am in fact always striving for my aspirations. I just have to take things a day at a time and do what I can, when I can, however I can. This can make it appear that I might be moving away instead because I don’t live off peanut butter and jelly and pound that pavement every waking minute I’m not working and forsaking sleep for financial gain (I’m not Mark Cuban). On the other hand, I do move away from things that I do fear, though I can honestly admit that with age I fearless. I used to move away from anything the jeopardized my job with the USPS, now I do not fear that because that is not what defines me. I used to fear being with someone who would essentially take me under but since being with Dale I do not fear that anymore because I know I will resurface. You can only fight with someone so much before you realize they have nothing to say and a new day will follow and life will go on. I do still have a healthy fear of weirdo’s and I do still move as far away from them as possible and I do fear losing my child to the dark underbelly of drugs so I read to him regularly. (Dead serious!)

2. External vs. Internal- Internal because it does not matter to me in the least what someone thinks about me or my life anymore. While I do appreciate someone complimenting me on stuff, I have heard it so little that I have learned to compliment myself. While I have always heard compliments on how I look, which is so trivial, and about the fact that I’m smart, I get more remarks about my crass nature, living situations, and life choices that I have developed a thick skin. So when someone, like the teachers, bosses, and family members of mine speak about their opinions on me and what’s mine I look inside and revalidate all my choices. (If I was external I would have drowned myself in a tub with a toaster by now, so Lifetime Original Movie, therefore I revalidate. I’m my own best cheerleader and worst enemy, go figure)

3. Sorting by Self vs. Sorting by Others- By self, because if I sorted by others I’d become overwhelmed. I prefer to help those who pose as a project to me therefore a way of rewarding myself when they are doing well in life. So I guess I don’t do anything for anyone that I don’t see a reward for. (Yes I am delusional; I’m working on this in therapy)

4. Matcher vs. Mismatcher- Matcher, because if I could afford to be an Obsessive Compulsive neat freak I would. Unfortunately, I let messy projects (human and inanimate) get the best of me but in my head its all neatly organized and subcategorized. Also when I look for a project they all fall along the same lines, I don’t like the unfamiliar because it takes me too long to become comfortably familiar even though I can decode the situation almost instantly. To further illustrate, most everyone in my life is of the same backgrounds which are like my background, and they look fairly similar in as many ways as I can feel comfortable with. The things in my house all flow along the same lines. My likes and dislikes all mirror each other. I like conformity as long as it’s not to be a meek unvocal individual and the people/things in my life are a reflection of that.

5. Possibility vs. Necessity- Well, I can see the possibility of a necessity. I went to work for the post office, 1. because my dad told me to, and 2. because I saw the possibility of making good money and where that could take me in life with the direction being away from the post office. Generally speaking though, I do things mostly out of necessity and with the hopes for the possibility to emerge that it will allow me to sally forge my way to greater things.

6. Independent vs. Proximity vs. Cooperative Working Styles- Proximity when I’m at work and independent in life. I get more accomplished when I don’t have to worry about what other people are thinking or feeling or complaining about. If I know what other people want or in general what needs to be done then just let me do my thing and it will get done. Though at the post office, I like having people around because the job is so mundane and repetitive, having people around lets me know that another day has passed and that Groundhog Day isn’t occurring. Also when going up against idiots, strength in numbers does help. Otherwise, no one would get there package, like ever.

Chapter 18: Value Hierarchies: The Ultimate Judgment of Success
Assignment: What are your values and how are you living your life congruently with your values?

Belonging
Common Sense
Creativity
Respectful
Intelligence
Project Oriented
Attractiveness
Patience’s l DOMESTICATION l
Loyalty
Cleanliness l WORK l
Open-Mindedness
Hard Working l SCHOOL l
Humor
Adventurous
Organization
Drive
Compassion
Assertiveness
Animatedness
Classical
Motherhood

To illustrate: (Not in corresponding order):

Belonging I am in a relationship with a man who will not leave me, literally, no matter what we fight about, ever.
Creativity, I have a blog with all my art and writing on it that I do whenever I can.
Intelligence, I’m in school and have been there on and off for 13 years and I plan on going to grad school.
Attractiveness, Dales hot, I’m hot, and our kids cute as can be.
Loyalty, I have a small estate (very small) people mooch off me and I don’t have to leave them homeless
Open-Mindedness, I say whatever I think when I think it.
Humor, I keep practicing my skit for Saturday Night Live in my head for my future YouTube audition.
Organization, when I have the money I buy Tupperware to separate my life into compartments (no joke)
Compassion, I have human projects, including myself
Animatedness, you would be cracking up if I was reading this to you aloud and when I read to my son I do all the goofy voices and we get goofy all the time. (It keeps me sane), also I dance at work like I’m on soul train when I have my headphones on.
Common Sense, they need to have a class for this, I’d pass, and most people wouldn’t.
Respectful, I only adhere to this if someone shows me respect; most don’t so in good conscious I can’t respect the disrespectful.
Project Oriented, I have about 18 going on at one time. 1/18 may get done, depends on how much time life allows me to work on any given one.
Patience’s, 1/18 is a good ratio to me.
Cleanliness, I live in messy disarray, not filth.
Hard-working, well it took hard work to get where I am, despite that it was along the Hard Knocks Road.
Adventurous, Hard Knocks Rd can be a wild Rd.
Drive, This is how I will get to the beach someday. (<- no joke) (joke->) Cause its how I’ve gotten there before (I hope you don’t dock my grade, I’m only making light of the impossibility it is for me to answer things simply, so this is turning into a long assignment, I apologize.)
Assertiveness, I don’t like people who can’t say what they mean to say, and I tend to steer clear of them and I myself always am blunt and to the point so there is little confusion as to what I’m saying, thinking, wanting, needing and/or feeling.
Classical, I like Turner Classic Movies.
Motherhood, domestication, work, and school are my core. I do these without thought daily. I take care of my son's needs and wants, I do my daily household chores and run it as head of it, I go to my job, and I do my school work to the best of my ability always!