Chapter 5 Self Summary

        In chapter 5, the self, how we understand our “self” concept is discussed. We develop self-recognition around 18-24 months of age and when we become an adult it expands into our 4 components of the “self”, those being: 

• self-knowledge (beliefs, formulation, and organization about who we think we are), 
• self-control (our plans and how we execute them), 
• impression management (presentation of our self), 
• self-esteem (how we feel about our self). 

        Each of these four items is then broken down further to elaborate on how they each work. Such as: 

• self-knowledge is a composition of cultural differences (independent western views vs. interdependent eastern views) 
• gender differences (men, group memberships, vs. women, rationale close relationships, in interdependency) 
• introspection (rationalizing our actions and decisions based on the reasoning that may or may not be accurate)
• self behavior observation (consisting of... 

1. self-perception theory, when we don’t understand how we feel and we have to rely on our actions to fill in the ambiguity 
2. over-justification effect, where extrinsic reasons rely on more than intrinsic reasons and 
3. 2-factor theory of emotion, arousal provoked then explanation for it is sought after), understanding our mindset abilities (fixed, leaving no room for growth in failure and growth, where we will fail but press on in determination),
4. social comparison theory (where we learn about ourselves through the eyes of other people and their thoughts about us). 

        Self-control is elaborated on through the explanation of expenditure of energy and how if we expend too much on one self-control we may lack enough energy to expend for another control we may be attempting at the same time. Impression management suggests that we are actors and actresses in the performances of our lives trying to convince our audiences of who we want them to think we are. 2 ways we go about doing that is through ingratiation, excessive ego-boosting and butt-kissing, and self-handicapping, where we can create our own roadblocks then gripe about them later like they were the real reason for our downfall. Self-esteem is one of the essentials to avoiding depression and helps us deal creatively (through terror management theory) with mortality, however, too much of a good thing is not a good thing anymore and can lead to a narcissistic personality where you lack empathy and just turn into a cold-hearted person who’s self-centered.

        The whole world is definitely my stage. I am very extroverted while also being extremely introverted. I keep what is highly important to me out in the open and I keep shallow things close to my heart that way people think they are digging for a treasure that’s under lock and key, leaving what I love alone. I keep them digging for a false idol. I have always been honest with people, maybe to bluntly honest, but the funny thing about that is that people really do prefer to be lied to then hear the truth because they seldom believe the truth. In an essence, you could lay it all out there and as long as you do it with a giant smile and a pleasant tone in your voice they will more than likely not believe you, but if you come up with a juicy elaborate story and Gaga-esk flamboyancies then they will believe every word you utter and watch your every move to interrupt it the wrong way. To further my on-stage performance I self handicap myself so that I have a better platform on which to stand. I mean how many simple-problem free people do you know, and if you do, do they have anything to contribute to the working classes gossip column that people use to pass the time that they spend miserably working and missing out on life. Without a platform in which to stand and commiserate with these people, I would be even lonelier than I already am. So the post office is my stage, my actions are my terror management and life is my handicap, but I do have a plan so I am not in a fixed mindset but a long hard road of growth mindset, so I’m not completely doomed.